Shattered

Cancer. Its a 6-letter word that nobody ever thinks they will hear. I never thought I would hear it said about my husband, let alone so early on in marriage. We found out on Wednesday, August 5, 2009 that Mike has thyroid cancer. We were also told that if you are going to get cancer, this is the one to get because it is so curable. Those same people who say that have obviously never had it. Cancer is a word that can shatter your world - and it did shatter ours, for the second time this year.

Late in January, we discovered that we were pregnant. Since we had just gotten married the July before that and Mike was in school working on his degree, this was a huge surprise that we welcomed with open arms. I had the normal first trimester symptoms - morning sickness, fatigue, cravings - you name it. My OB told me this was all a great sign that it was a normal pregnancy. Ha! Normal?!? At 7 weeks, we were told from an ultrasound that there was no baby - that the sack was empty and that I would miscarry over the next week. We lost the pregnancy at 8 weeks. I have never known that kind of emotional anguish.

Fast forward to about a month before our first anniversary. We decided to get a massage - a romantic couples massage. Mike's therapist found the mass on his thyroid and told him to get it checked out. He went to the doctor and then had a needle aspiration biopsy done to his left thyroid. After the biopsy we were scheduled for a much needed 2-week camping vacation to the Pacific Northwest and it was amazing. We asked the doctor to wait until we got back before giving us the results.

Fast forward again two weeks later. Shattered. Again. Mike has papillary thyroid cancer. What do you do when your whole world comes crashing down? We both have so many things we want to do in life - how is cancer going to play into that?

We both agree that God is going to use this in amazing ways. No, God is not responsible for giving Mike cancer. We believe with our whole heart that God allowed this cancer to happen though. We are still trying to figure out the reason why. Still. Hmmm. Interesting word. It's only been a little over a week.